gaiagal

Tuesday, August 03, 2004

Warning: Whining Ahead

John is working nights this week. He's never done this before, and it's only been one night so far. I'm not enjoying it....I have NO down time. He was home at 7:30am, and just got up now at 3:00. He's leaving in an hour. I'm worried about Lil's cardiology appointment tomorrow, and will just have to worry alone tonight. Ugh. People with 'normal' kids aren't great choices to voice stress to over these things. They've not had the test where the doc makes you sit down before he discusses the results. They've not waited in a tiny room while a team of 20 brings their child's body temp to freezing and stops the heart and pokes and sews it. They've not had the experience of seeing other families torn up by the death of a child with a heart defect....sometimes something far less 'serious' than Lily's defect. Really, you'd never know anything was wrong with the little beauty. And her heart is functioning well at the moment. But, still, before these appointments I am anxious. Anxious? Well, extremely anxious. I have been known to excuse myself from the examining room to go puke. During one of my own echos I had to get off the table twice. Finally, I got the hang of scheduling these tests first thing in the morning, and I don't eat before. So, we're off the Hartford Children's at 8am. Could be a long night.

1 Comments:

  • At 8/04/2004 05:25:00 AM, Blogger chasmyn said…

    You're in my thoughts. I used to freaking hate the doctor visits - any of them. They were torture for Quinn and so unfair to him, as he didn't understand why I always brought him to the place where people poked and prodded and gave him shots and stuck things to him and made him drink really yucky stuff that made him want to vomit.

    So hard to deal with.

     

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