Friday, June 25, 2004

A shift in perspective

Went to see Mamma Mia this week. Fun stuff, lots of laughs and singing along...not usual for an event at the Bushnell. It was the story of a young woman about to get married on a Greek island. She read her mother's diary hoping to discover the identity of her father, and was shocked to discover that it could be any one of 3 men. She invites all of them to the wedding without her mother knowing. Sometime between 'Dancing Queen' and 'Take A Chance on Me' I realized that I didn't relate at all to the young woman about to get married, but actually to her mother. How did this happen? My view of my contemporaries may be warped. I remember being at the park when Lily was an infant, and when chatting with the other moms thinking that I had little in common with them. One day I saw a woman with 2 little ones at the slide. More modern clothes, enthused with the kiddos, interesting hair cut. As we talked, it became apparent that she was the 18 year old au-pair from Germany. I enjoyed talking with her much more than the moms my own age. I do have one thing in common with all the other moms, of course: kids. And there is always something to chat about when it comes to kids. In my experience, many moms spend a good amount of time complaining about their roles as moms or their situations. 'I have sooooo much to pack to get ready for Disneyworld' 'OMG, Sam kept me up ALL night. What am I going to do?' So, part of me knows that all the whining is just a way of making small talk. But I can't tolerate it. I always want to give them just a bit of our story to shock them into enjoying their own setup. I don't often do it, but at times I have to bite my tongue. When listening to someone complain endlessly about a cold or ear infection I want to tell them that I would give anything if an ear infection were my only health worry with my daughter. Really, I like my perspective. I wouldn't change what we've been through. And the new slight shift in mom perspective isn't bad either.


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